(cómo caer en el abismo de la locura en 6 sencillos pasos)
1. ANTES DE LA LEY
He aquí un trabajador responsable, que lame con diligencia las suelas de los zapatos de su jefe, vocifera órdenes a sus subordinados y siempre que acosa sexualmente a su secretaria tiene la delicadeza de volver boca abajo sobre la mesa el retrato de su mujer y sus hijos.
2. EL MOMENTO DEL SHOCK
Junto a la máquina de café, un entrañable compañero de trabajo transmite la catastrófica noticia: ya no se podrá fumar en la oficina. Nuestro héroe intenta recibir el golpe con estoicismo, pero los cimientos esenciales de su cordura comienzan a resquebrajarse.
3. VIDA EN LA CLANDESTINIDAD
Ya en el despacho, y obedeciendo impulsos criminales inconscientes, la mano del trabajador se mueve por cuenta propia, buscando ese cigarrillo imprescindible para comprender en toda su profundidad el contenido filosófico del “Marca”.
4. A SOLAS CON EL HORROR
Cae por fin la máscara de la resignación, y asoma su rostro la demencia más absoluta. El delincuente torturado repite para sí el mantra salvador: “En mi interior sé que también será bueno para mí, en mi interior sé que también será bueno para mí”. Pero es inútil: todo lo que consigue la cantinela es dejar en su boca angustiada un empalagoso sabor a paternalismo gubernamental.
5. DESATADO
Franqueado el punto de no retorno, el criminal comienza a atacar a inocentes en busca del cigarrillo de sus anhelos. Le empuja a ello la burlona voz subterránea de su incipiente cáncer de pulmón, que canturrea: “En tu interior, sabes que también será bueno para MÍ”.
6. ENTRE DOS MUNDOS
Los hechos llegan a su conclusión lógica e inevitable: nuestro trágico protagonista, torturado por las órdenes contradictorias de ley y carcinoma, no ve más salida a su situación que afeitarse la cabeza y deambular por ahí con un hacha en brazos. ¿Hasta cuándo seguiremos permitiendo que la ley antitabaco convierta a personas decentes en locos peligrosos?
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