Rouco Valeria presenta su colección de verano

Amigas, el verano ha dejado de ser la temporada de asueto que siempre fue para todos los cristianos (excepto para jornaleros, peones de caminos, víctimas de guerras injustas y otras gentes que nos traen sin cuidado y por cuyo bienestar tampoco vale la pena salir a manifestarse, con lo fresquita que se está en el rincón más umbrío de la catedral).

Hoy vivimos tiempos de tiniebla, y el hombre de fe se ve obligado a luchar en la calle, llueva, truene o ardan los cielos, por los valores fundamentales de la Humanidad, que por pura casualidad y aunque les fastidie a algunas envidiosas, resulta que son los que dicta nuestra secta (eh, tampoco es culpa nuestra si somos más justas y sabias que nadie).

Eso sí, nuestra sufrida labor en pro del bien y la democracia, nuestro deber de creyentes no nos obliga a marchar zarrapastrosas como el manifestante común. Muy al contrario: nada de camisetas de manga corta (¡o sin mangas!), bermudas u otras ordinarieces del mismo género. El manifestante cristiano camina embutido en su uniforme azabache de siervo de Cristo, y se abstiene de emplear el satánico desodorante que desnaturalizaría la esencia del aroma a España moderna, humanista y tolerante que desprende su cuerpo bajo el sol justiciero que algún día, algún día no muy lejano, purgará esta tierra de sodomitas, separatistas, ateos y fans de Juanito Valderrama. Ya veréis como tengo razón, chicas.

Os presento a continuación, con la inestimable ayuda de Toni Toledo, mi nueva colección de verano, ideal para salir a manifestarnos contra las bodas gays o cualquier otro tema que tenga muy poquito que ver con las injusticias que ocurren en el mundo.

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20 Responses

  1. Joselito dice:

    Alejandro, se está usted jugando la excomunión.

  2. Álex dice:

    Estaría bien, pero como no comulgué creo que no hay nada que hacer. ¿Podrían quizá exbautizarme? Sería bonito si hubiese una ceremonia inversa, en la que pudiera echarle uno al cura un jarro de agua helada en la calva.

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