Son las 23 horas 17 minutos de un día cualquiera.
Has salido urgentemente a comprar un cartucho de churras con merinas al 24 horas.
Pero… ¡un momento! La puerta de la vecina del primero está abierta. Se oyen ruidos de forcejeo… cristales rotos. ¿Qué hacer? ¿Y si entras y resulta que está jugando en la Wii al Apaleaviejas 2000?
No… mira la cerradura… la han forzado. Está ocurriendo algo terrible.
De repente, ya no te apetecen tanto las churras con merinas. Te gustaría volver a casa, echar doble llave a tu puerta y convencerte a ti mismo de que no has visto nada.
¡No! ¿Qué diría tu madre si te viera, además de criticarte por salir a la calle en pijama y pantuflas?
Haciendo acopio de valor, atraviesas la puerta y te encuentras con esto:
Si antes tenías ganas de irte, ahora quisieras desaparecer sin más, evaporarte en el aire. Pero estás ahí, y eres dolorosamente consciente de tu propio cuerpo, de tus piernas que te pesan como el plomo, de tu respiración acelerada, del sudor que te chorrea por la frente.
No eres un héroe. Tus brazos son dos alambres envueltos en pellejo flácido y tu barriga blancuzca se desborda por encima del pantalón del pijama.
Pero… ¡espera! Hay algo que puedes hacer… metes una mano trémula en el bolsillo de la bata y… ¡Sí! ¡Tienes el móvil!
Ahora sí, a pesar del miedo, lo sacas y cumples con tu obligación cívica.


La obligación cívica de sacarte unas pelillas vendiendo el vídeo a “Callejeros”, ¿no? Jejeje, menudos cabrones estáis hechos… Y que dure!
Un fuerte e irreverente abrazo.
Se hará lo que se pueda, caballero.
Entre tanto, y como diría Lina Morgan, ¡gracias por venir!
Putos:-)
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